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Becoming a Parent
Fostering and Adoption
American Civil Liberties Union. Too High a Price: The Case Against Restricting Gay Parenting Updated Second Edition, November 13, 2023
Families Like Ours: A GLBT-oriented group providing information on fostering and adoption.
Human Rights Campaign Foundation. “Adoption”: provides a basic overview of issues. Includes a list of adoption agencies that welcome GLBT clients.
Human Rights Campaign Foundation. “Foster Parenting”: provides a basic overview of issues.
Lambda Legal. “In Your State”: presents US laws for each state, including rights to adoption and second-parent adoption. Just click on your state.
McGarry, Kevin. Fatherhood for Gay Men: An Emotional and Practical Guide to Becoming a Gay Dad. New York: Harrington Park Press, 2003. ISBN: 1560233877.
Savage, Dan. The Kid: What Happened After My Boyfriend and I Decided to Go Get Pregnant: An Adoption Story. New York: Dutton, 1999. ISBN: 0525945253.
Insemination & Surrogacy
Aizley, Harlyn. Buying Dad: One Woman’s Search for the Perfect Sperm Donor. Los Angeles: Alyson Books, 2003. ISBN: 1555837557.
Brill, Stephanie A. The New Essential Guide to Lesbian Conception, Pregnancy, & Birth, New York: Alyson Books, 2006. ISBN: 1555839401.
Growing Generations: the oldest and largest surrogacy and egg donation firm dedicated to serving the gay and lesbian community. GLBT owned.
Human Rights Campaign Foundation. “Donor Insemination”: provides a basic overview of issues. Includes a list of lesbian-friendly sperm banks.
Human Rights Campaign Foundation. “Surrogacy": provides a basic overview of issues.
Menichiello, Michael. A Gay Couple’s Journey Through Surrogacy: Intended Fathers. Haworth Series in GLBT Family Studies. New York: Haworth Press, 2006. ISBN: 0789028190.
Miracles Waiting: a nonprofit organization offering information on getting started and linking embryo donors and recipients.
Pepper, Rachel. The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians: How to Stay Sane and Care for Yourself from Preconception through Birth. 2nd ed. San Francisco: Cleis Press, 2005. ISBN: 157344216X.
Community
Blogs and Podcasts
GayParenting Show: listen to the 30+ episodes by host Scott Sherman.
LesbianDad: lesbian parenthood, from a non-birthmom point of view.
LesbianFamily.org: a blogroll; helps you find blogs on a variety of lesbian parenting topics. Gay dads are welcome.
Mombian: lifestyle site for lesbian moms, offering a mix of parenting, politics, diversions, and resources to strengthen and sustain lesbian moms in all their varied roles.
2dadsblog: two dads from New York share their experiences with adopting and raising their daughter.
Websites and Listservs
COLAGE: Children of Lesbians & Gays Everywhere, the only national organization in the world specifically supporting children, youth and adults with LGBT parent(s).
Families Like Mine: a website created in 1999 by Abigail Garner, author of the Lambda Literary finalist Families Like Mine: Children of Gay Parents Tell It Like It Is.
FamilyPride: national nonprofit organization dedicated to securing family equality. Starting in 1979 as the Gay Fathers Coalition, it expanded to include lesbian families in 1986 and all loving families in 1998.
GQTGParenting: a community for parents and prospective parents who are transgender, transsexual, gender variant or gender queer; a listserv that has been active since 2004.
HRC Family net: The main Human Rights Campaign page for all issues affecting GLBT families.
National Black Justice Coalition: a civil rights organization dedicated to empowering Black same-gender-loving, lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people.
PlanetOut Families: News and links for GLBT families produced by PlanetOut.
Transparentcy: founded March 2001 to fill the void of information and resources for transgender parents and their children.
Trikone: a nonprofit organization for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people of South Asian descent. Founded in 1986 in the San Francisco Bay Area.
2moms2dads.com: links to articles and resources specifically for gay and lesbian parents and potential parents.
Two-Spirit Press Room: 2SPR appeared in order to bridge the gap between cultural literacy for press and media, as well as media literacy for Indigenous GLBT communities.
Zuna Institute: organization that advocates on behalf of black lesbians on a national level. Founded in 1999.
Groups Near You
East US
Gay Fathers Coalition of Richmond, VA: promotes and sponsors activities designed to present a positive image of alternative parenting.
Gay Fathers of Greater Boston: works to educate its members, the media, and the public about gay parenting. Founded in 1982.
Lambda Mu – Buffalo, NY: aims to support lesbians who are, want to be, or are friends and family of lesbian mothers.
The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Community Center: located in the heart of Greenwich Village, New York. The center was established in 1983 and serves 6,000 people each week, including many parenting groups.
Rainbow Families of New Jersey: an all-volunteer, nonprofit organization dedicated to serving the needs of GLBT parents, their children, and those interested in becoming parents.
Midwest US
Midwest Alternative Family Alliance: Support for GLBT parents and their children in Kansas City and beyond.
Rainbow Families: one of the strongest GLBT family organizations in the country. Based in Minneapolis, MN
Soul Essence Minnesota: Soul Essence exists to provide a model of unity and pride for African-American GLBT residents of the Twin Cities.
South US
Houston Gay and Lesbian Parents: a diverse social group for lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender parents, their partners and their kids, and also parents in planning.
MEGA Family Project: a nonpartisan, statewide organization dedicated to educating, empowering, and strengthening the GLBT community. Based in Atlanta, GA.
West US
Denver Lesbian Moms Meetup Group: Meetups started in October 2003 and are going strong.
Family Matters: San Diego’s only educational and social parenting group for the GLBT community.
Our Family Coalition: Formed in 1994, this San Francisco Bay Area group protects the civil rights and well being of families with GLBT members through education, advocacy, social networking and grassroots community organizing.
Pop Luck Club: Founded in 1998, this group from the Los Angeles area has grown into the largest known gay fathers organization in the world, with hundreds of families.
Spectrum: Promoting acceptance, understanding, and full inclusion for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people in the North Bay (Marin County, CA) since 1982.
Canada
Calgary Gay Fathers: an informal community formed to support questioning, bisexual, and gay fathers.
Family Service Association of Toronto - LGBT Parenting Network: provides resources, information and support to LGBT parents and their families. Now fully funded by the Ministry of Health and Long Term Care.
Gay Fathers of Toronto: support group that has been helping men on their journey for over 25 years.
Gay Fathers of Winnipeg: a mutual support group consisting of gay fathers, partners, and other gay men seeking a support system.
UK
Pink Parents: offers a range of support services and social activities for all LGBT families.
Australia
Lemonkind – Family Ties: Lemonkind, the website that is “Lemon Aid for Women Down Under” has articles for lesbian moms and children of lesbians.
Books for Your Kids
Silverrod, Nancy. “GLBT Resources for Children: A Bibliography”: a list of resources created for the American Library Association’s GLBT Round Table.
Print Resources for You
Aizley, Harlyn. Confessions of the Other Mother: Nonbiological Lesbian Moms Tell All. Boston: Beacon Press, 2006. ISBN: 9780807079638.
Bernstein, Robert. Families of Value: Personal Profiles of Pioneering Lesbian and Gay Parents. New York: Marlowe & Co., 2005. ISBN: 1560256389.
Lev, Arlene Istar. The Complete Lesbian & Gay Parenting Guide. New York: Berkley Books, 2004. ISBN: 0425191974.
Priwer, Shana, and Cynthia Phillips. Gay Parenting: Complete Guide for Same-Sex Families. Far Hills, NJ: New Horizon Press, 2006. ISBN: 0882822713.
Our Author Advisors
Marian Dane Bauer
Nancy Garden
Gregory Maguire
Jacqueline Woodson
Summer Camps
Camp Lavender Hill: Camp Lavender Hill is held at Camp Watanda, situated on beautiful Lake Vera and located two and a half miles from downtown Nevada City, California, and three miles from the Yuba River. Campers enjoy hiking, swimming, crafts, and outdoor games in this beautiful wooded area. This year’s camp will be held July 13–19.
Camp Ten Oaks: This camp is located approximately 45 minutes north of Ottawa in the Gatineau Hills region of Quebec. The summer schedule at Camp Ten Oaks is designed to provide campers of all ages with an extraordinary camp experience, including both traditional and cutting-edge activities. Camp runs August 17–23.
Camp Ten Trees: This camp is located in Washington state. Each day at camp is filled with activities that are tailored to the interests of the campers, providing numerous opportunities to experience new challenges and adventures. The daily schedule is structured to provide campers with lots of options, whether it be trying out something new or sticking with an old favorite. Dates are yet to be announced.
CampOut: Located near Athol, Massachusetts. CampOut has two camps for ages 8–18, one at the Farm School from July 28 to August 1 and one at the Open View Farm with dates to be determined. Children learn and connect through activities at these working, organic farms. Check the website for the latest information.
Mountain Meadow: This camp is located in southern New Jersey. This is a two-week overnight camping experience where children ages 9–17 in LGBTQ or other non-traditional families come together to participate in interactive learning experiences that help them take on leadership roles, build community, and just plain have fun. This year’s camp runs from August 10–23.
Summer Camps for the Whole Family
Camp It Up!: Located near Quincy, California, this was the first LGBT-headed family camp in the country. It takes pride in creating a community that embraces both diversity and commonality, and supports all families and family members. There is one session August 3–10. Families may stay three to seven nights.
Rainbow Families Camp: This camp is located near Alexandria, Minnesota. Check this Minneapolis-based agency’s website for news on dates for this summer’s fun.
Rainbow Family Camp: This camp is located near St. Germain, Wisconsin. There are two sessions this year. The first session is July 13–19, when Rainbow Family teams up with PFLAG. The second session, August 10–16, is just the Rainbow Family group. The camp is run by the Wisconsin Conference United Church of Christ.
Spectrum Family Camp: Located in Glen Ellen, California, Spectrum’s goal is a weekend of fun July 11–13. It’s a rewarding community gathering that will give you and your children a lifetime of memories. All children under 18 are welcome.
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