Megan's Story

I'm the luckiest person in the world. I don't mean to seem smug, but there it is.

See, I have two parents who love me and support me in everything I do—no matter what I decide to pursue or how hard it is sometimes to get there. They are both strong, brilliant women who continue to earn my love and respect every day. I believe that many parents are like this, but I am lucky because not only are my moms amazing people, they have also raised me to be aware of the world and the difference I can make in it.

My mom didn't realize she was a lesbian until after she was married to my dad. When I was four years old, they divorced. After a messy custody battle, in which my dad tried to claim that my mom's sexual orientation would make her an unfit parent (fortunately, his plan didn't work), they were both given custody of me, with my mom getting the bulk of the time.

At the time, I couldn't have cared less about my mom's sexual orientation. Once, when I was five, she told me that she was having a couple of her lesbian friends over for dinner, and I got really excited. When her friends arrived, however, I was extremely disappointed and exclaimed, "But, Mom, these are just women!" Confused, my mom asked me, "Megan, what exactly do you think lesbians are?" to which I replied, "Little green men!" One of the biggest disappointments of my life was finding out my mom's friends were just women and not, in fact, leprechauns.

I was very open about my mom being a lesbian right from the start, and much to my mom's chagrin would sometimes announce to restaurant waiters, "We're all lesbians at this table!" I told everyone who would listen, and I learned fairly quickly that a lot of people weren't as accepting as I thought they would be. Teachers would scoff at my family portraits of two women and a child; parents sometimes wouldn't let their kids sleep over at my house. I was completely shocked at these reactions, since I loved my mom and took it for granted that love was everyone's priority.

(Parents: For tips on talking with your child about "coming out," read the article on our Parent Page.)

When I was ten, my mom met and fell in love with Jane, who quickly became my second mom. Jane was perfect for my mom, and seeing the two of them together only increased my desire to talk about my family and what made it wonderful. I started speaking out more when I heard someone saying, "that's so gay" or using the "f" or "d" word. My mom had always taught me not to hate, and in junior high I started learning how to educate instead of fight.

My first year of high school, I started the school's first Gay / Straight Alliance (GSA) and dealt with an onslaught of homophobia from fellow students. My classmates accused me of promoting "special rights" for gays and constantly tried to start fights with me over what they thought was their right to use whatever kind of language they felt like. One student even stopped me in the hall over and over again to tell me that because I had two moms I was going to hell.

The classroom was no different; though there were several GLBT teachers, most of the staff had no idea how to deal with diversity, and when the debate over gay rights came up (as it inevitably would), the teachers would sit back and allow students to make jeering comments about my lesbian moms.

At times I was afraid and hurt by my experiences and what people said, but my moms were always there for me, and our peaceful, fun-filled home life was my safety net. It wasn't hard to see how transparent homophobic comments were when my family was so loving. So I kept going to school and working on the Gay/Straight Alliance and making friends with the handful of people who joined the GSA.

And then, gradually, things began to change. More kids came out as GLBT, teachers started stopping homophic remarks, and my peers started leaving me alone. By the time I reached my junior year of high school, I had the respect, if not friendship, of most of the school.

I will never forget the day my junior year when a couple of seniors stopped me in the hall to ask me serious questions about gays and lesbians. They were uncomfortable at first but genuinely wanted to know why I was putting so much effort into defending the rights of gay students and adults.

We had been engaged in an intense but peaceful conversation for about twenty minutes when I looked up to see fifty or more students silently listening in, around where we were sitting, some students even spiraling up the stairs to the next floor.

We continued the conversation for most of the next class period, and almost no one left. I have no idea to this day how many people walked away with more knowledge of gay rights, but if anyone did, it was worth the rest of the struggle in high school.

After I graduated and moved to the East Coast to go to college, my mom, Jane, and I went on an R Family Vacations trip—the first Gay Family Cruise. Rosie O'Donnell, her wife, Kelli, and her best friend, Gregg Kaminski, put together the trip to give gays and lesbians with children a chance to relax and have some fun in the sun.

It was an unbelievable trip, and when a film director on the ship found out about my story, my family wound up featured in the documentary of the trip, an HBO film called "All Aboard: Rosie's Family Cruise." After the documentary aired, I was invited to come work for Rosie O' Donnell as a performer (I'm an actress), and just a couple of weeks ago, on the third and latest cruise, I was able to live one of my dreams, singing with some of Broadway's top performers.

It's been a unique struggle having two moms, but I know that because I have been confronted with discrimination, I am a better person. It sounds strange, but all the difficulties and insults over the years have made me even more proud of my family. I'm strong and loving, and I have two moms.

And really, I'm the luckiest person in the world.

Click here to watch a short video about Megan organizing the Gay-Straight Alliance at her school.